Chase "Talking"

Chase was cooing and smiling up a storm on the changing table. Of course he tamed it down considerably when I got the camera out! Oh, Well...it's still cute!

Why do babies have to grow up so fast! I cherish every moment I have with this little guy and I wish I could slow things down a bit! He is such a joy...that three dollar bottle of gas drops has been a lifesaver. He is a much happier and content baby!

I put Chase in the exersaucer for the first time today. He looked like such a big boy! He even made it bounce a few times. He was completely mesmorized by all the toys and colors on it!

It's Official!!!

On Friday, I resigned as Director of Nursing following my maternity leave. Although I would love to stay home with the kids full-time (look at that face who wouldn't) I will go back to work part-time in January. Ideally I would love to work only 2 days a week on days when my mom is off so that she can watch the kids. Not sure that is possible at this point, I have to see what the new Director needs and wants! I am very excited, I have loved being on maternity leave. I love taking the kids to school and picking them up everyday. Its unbelievable the quality time we have in the late afternoon and evening that we never had before! Christian really misses his friends at daycare, luckily his best friend goes to the same preschool. He loves being at home with me more!!!

Chase is 2 Months!

Our little man is growing so fast! Why does time have to fly! I took Chase in for his two month check up, he weighed a whopping 13# 9 1/2 oz and was 23 1/2 inches long. He got his first vaccines, didn't enjoy them, but was OK once I picked him up! He is smiling and reacting to everyone which is such a fun milestone!

Halloween 2009

Our little pea pod!!!



Christian the Vampire and Madelyn as Fancy Nancy!

This year was such a great Halloween, the "big" kids really got into it!! For the first time they actually went trick or treating door to door. They loved it! Chase also went door to door to our neighbors since most of them had not met him yet.

Chase's Baptism

We had Chase baptized on All Saints Sunday! Christian stood up there asking pastor questions the whole time. It was so cute. Emily, Chase's godmother, was unable to make it since she was a "roadie" with Vertical Horizon. We will have to recreate pictures later. Uncle Justin was there though!!!!

Suzy Homemaker?

Madelyn's pumpkin


In the roaster cooking!


The empty shells


The puree draining!

Enough puree to make 9 pies!!!!


The finished product...I wanted a pic of it as a full pie...but someone else had other ideas!!!


So I had a the best time making REAL pumpkin pie. I am actually considering making Chase's baby food from scratch it was so fun and satisfying! I know I am nuts...but at this point that is a given.

Cheated????

I feel cheated...like I completely missed the experience. I know that I should be extremely happy that I have a perfect, healthy baby boy. Don't get me wrong Chase is wonderful, but I am still grieving for the birth experience that I looked forward to for 9+ months. There is something empowering about giving birth and seeing the baby you have grown inside for 9 months. I realize that people have c-sections everyday, but under general anesthesia is not a common occurence. And I don't think I would feel this way if I could have been awake for the c-section. I missed it all...I was asleep. I missed his first cry, I missed the reaction of my husband, kids and family when they heard "Its a boy". Before I was even conscience most of my family and friends knew what I had before I did.

To top it off the recovery from my c-section was terrible. I would deliver 10 more 9 1/2 pound babies like Madelyn before I would ever choose to go through another c-section. This is another reason I feel cheated. Was I done having kids? Maybe. Maybe not. But this experience (birth and recovery) makes the decision to have more children downright agonizing. After having Madelyn, I knew I had to have another baby girl. I can't imagine life without my sister and I definitely wanted Madelyn to have that experience as well. But now...my choices are to have another c-section or a VBAC. Not a fan of the VBAC, because I have seen what can happen. Plus with the VBAC, I wouldn't be able to have an induction so most likely I would carry the next pregnancy past the due date, and have to have a c-section anyway because with my age I wouldn't want to go past 41 weeks. Besides the fact that if I did go past the due date I would have a huge baby and stretching the uterus that much would just increase the risk for uterine rupture. And frankly uterine rupture is one birth emergency I could do without (especially since I have already experienced shoulder dystocia and prolapsed cord). So now have I been cheated out of the baby girl I long for?

Chase Micheal Harrifeld

OUR NEW FAMILY!!!


It was a little scary...but our newest addition is finally here. Just when you think you are an old hand at something; you get thrown a curve ball! Chase's induction (my third) started out like all the other inductions. Cytotec times two the night before, Dr. breaks my water in the am, epidural in and the rest smooth sailing....WRONG! The Cytotec was right and my doctor did come in and break my water in the am; but after he broke the water Chase decided he did not want to go that way and moved up. When the doctor went to put the scalp electrode on his head the head was not reachable when it had been prior to breaking the water. Regardless of this, everything seemed to be going fine. Anesthesia came in to do the epidural, they sat me up to place it...went in without any problems. The nurse waited about 10 minutes for the epidural to take effect before she checked me again. I also had a resident in the room who wanted to check me to for the "experience"...got to love being a guinea pig!!!!! When the nurse started to check me she said "I am holding your baby's hand"...then the look of terror flushed over her face and I said "and you have cord don't you" She said "yes" I said "C-section" and she said "yes". The resident was still standing there gloved and ready to go...she looks at him and says "I'm not taking my hand out go get help and tell them to call Martin (my doctor) and Bejot (anesthesia). All this happened at around 9:10/9:15. I think that the cord prolapsed when they sat me up for the epidural. Next thing I know I am being rolled down the hall with the nurse lying on the bed with me. My mom had taken the kids out of the room while they were checking me and next thing she knows all these people are running into the room and then I am being wheeled out. Needless to say she was freaking. I was freaking a little too but not too bad because I knew it was necessary and I knew what was going on.

I was in the Operating Room at 9:19am...when they rolled me in Dr. Bejot said this will be general anesthesia (even though my epidural was in, it was not dosed high enough for a c-section and there was NO time to get it there). That's when I lost it. For one I have never had general anesthesia and even though I worked in the OR for 6 years and saw it done several times a day I still didn't want to go through it myself. Secondly, now everyone was going to know what I was having before I would...made me really wish I had found out what I was having. Anesthesia was induced at 9:24am, incision at 9:26am and Chase was born at 9:29am. This whole time my nurse was under the drapes holding on to the umbilical cord and reporting to my doctor Chase's heartrate and trying to keep his head off of the umbilical cord.

I can't say that I was really surprised by the events that happened since at my last ultrasound I asked the tech what is all that up by the head and she said umbilical cord. It looked to me like a ton of umbilical cord right in front of his face and then both hands were up in the face. I remember thinking during the ultrasound, I hope that cord moves or we could have problems...obviously it didn't.

Thank God for all the staff at BryanLGH. Thank God I had the baby there and not in Tecumseh because I wouldn't be holding a baby right now. Thank God I didn't have him at St. Elizabeth's because it would have taken my doctor a good 20 minutes to get there, I would still probably have a baby but he could have had some effects from the prolapsed cord. Instead the whole ordeal took less than 20 minutes, his Apgars were 8, 9, 9 and he is absolutely perfect.


What a miracle!

35 weeks-Can I make it?!?!?!?

Don't get me wrong...I love being pregnant!!! But working and being pregnant is not fun right now. My stress level is way to high; my patience is growing thin and I just have an overall bad attitude. I think I need to move to England so I can be on maternity leave already like Vicky! I know that if this baby comes before the due date it will be because of work. I never had any contractions with the other two kids...not really even braxton hicks (maybe a handful in the last week or so). This pregnancy I have had quite a few periods of contractions and painful ones at that. I notice they always hit if I have over done it or I am stressed by work. My dr. appt next week could be interesting as I have never dilated prior to going into the hospital and having medications to start me dilating. Literally never even a 1/2 or 1/4 of a centimeter!!! I have my group B strep test next week...I will be interested to see if I have dilated.

Just don't know how much longer I can hang in there and do both...something has got to give. I either need to stop working or have this baby!!!!

First Day of School!!!

Today was Madelyn's first day of Kindergarten and Christian's first day of Preschool (outside of the preschool he always had at daycare)!

Both kids had a wonderful time although when you ask them...all they did was play!!! Madelyn says her favorite part of school was recess. The playground was definitely not their friend as they both came home with scraps and bruises. Christian agrees with recess being his favorite and adds playing with his friend Austin!!! Austin and Christian are inseparable. They are best friends, they have gone to daycare together ever since we moved down here. They are quite rambunctious when they are together!!!! Austin's mom and I decided that after preschool together this year...they will never let them be in the same Kindergarten together next year.

When I asked the kids what you learned at school today, Madelyn said "the school rules". Christian said "I really didn't listen!!!!" God help that teacher!!!!!

Madelyn said she made a lot of new friends; Christian said "no, I just played with Austin, I don't need more friends!"

Well now I got to figure out what the kids are going to wear for school pictures...who has school pictures on the second day of school!?!?!?!?

Twenty Weeks down...Twenty to go!!!!

Well halfway through the pregnancy and I made it. It has definitely been a struggle with the nausea and heart palpitations. But the nausea is 100% gone and now that the cardiologist has listened to me the heart palpitations are gone too. The anticipation is killing me this pregnancy, I can't remember wanting the pregnancy to be over and the baby to be here with the other two as badly as I do with this one. Although with the stress of work lately...not sure if its the maternity leave that is making the anticipation that much more real!!!!

Even though there really wasn't anything that I HAD TO HAVE for this baby (except maybe the baby book)...I can't resist shopping for the wee one! My biggest purchase has been a rocker recliner, with the other two kids my legs would fall asleep at 2am when I was up nursing on the sofa with my feet propped up on the coffee table (they fell asleep because I would fall asleep and wake up an hour later, with a sleeping baby and the inability to walk safely).

One of the nurses that works for me bought me the cutest teddy bear for the crib...it straps to the bars and plays womb sounds for 40 minutes. Hopefully we won't have sleeping problems with this baby...like we did with Christian...but if we do, hopefully the bear helps.

I have my second ultrasound of many (because of the heart medication I am on I have to have ultrasounds every 4-6 weeks from now on) on Friday. I am really excited to see the baby and all the development that has gone on the last 10 weeks. Of course this is the ultrasound that we could find out the sex, but once again we won't be finding out. It was way to much fun not knowing with Christian!!!! The only time I waiver is when I am out shopping and see the cutest little outfits...that I can't buy unless I want to return it all later. With all the extra ultrasounds and the possibility of a 3D ultrasound, it may be difficult to keep it a secret from us...but we'll try.

I took a quiz online to see what the baby was according to old wives' tales...it said 50% chance boy, 50% chance girl...REALLY!?!?!?!? Some aspects of the pregnancy make me think boy...like the heart palpitations (because I did not have them with Madelyn's pregnancy). But then the condition of my skin and the babies lack of activity reminds me of Madelyn's pregnancy..so I think Girl. Christian was a constant mover and shaker, he did flips constantly...I could feel him moving from 15 weeks on whether I was sitting still or running down the halls at work. Madelyn...I had to be sitting, concentrating usually to feel her move...or I had to put pressure on my belly and she would kick (don't know if she hated/liked the warmth or pressure...but she always kicked and pushed at it). This baby is the same way...I rarely feel movement unless I am relaxed and sitting. So we'll see!

The kids are hoping for a girl. Madelyn wants a sister desperately...I think Christian wants a girl so then he doesn't have to share his room. Because until one of the kids are old enough for a basement bedroom they will have to share. I want a girl only because I can't imagine life without my sister, but I will be blessed either way. I told the kids..."it doesn't matter as long as its healthy"...then Madelyn whispered "but it would be better if it was a healthy girl right mom"!

Christmas Photos!

Why on earth do I put myself through the torture of Christmas Card pictures. Every year (except maybe when Madelyn was only a month old) they have been an absolute nightmare. Scott and I have never gotten so mad at each other as we have over Family or Kid Christmas Card pictures. ***This year I did learn a lesson and didn't ask for Scott's help!***

So I wasn't going to do it this year and some CRAZY voice inside of me said.."they're a year older...just try"! Big mistake! All I can say is Thank God for digital and if you only knew how many closed eye photos I deleted.

Getting pics alone was fairly easy...together impossible.






Nothing worked...bribery, begging, pleading, crying, threats...nothing!!! So once again..I am saying never again...but I know as well as everyone else...that I will still try again next year. One day it will work...it just may take 10 more years!

Priceless!

Airfare to Vegas......$300
Hotel.................$90
Food, Drinks & Taxi...$400
Souveniors............$100
Cost of New Vacuum....$200
Spending Time with the Girls........................PRICELESS!!!!

Being the good husband Scott is, he decided to clean the house before I got home from Vegas. While vacuuming he pushed the vacuum under Christian's bed. Any mom/wife knows....you never vacuum under a bed until you look under there first. Its amazing how things collect under there. Well a pair of Christian's PJs were under his. I got home and found a burnt pair of PJs and a vacuum that smelled like it was on fire every time you turned it on. He gets an E for Effort!!!

I do love my new vacuum though!!!

Trick or Treat?!?!?!?

Christian as Spiderman


Madelyn as Ariel the Little Mermaid

There is no way to describe how much better holidays are when you have kids!

Mom and I took the kids trick or treating at the nursing home we work at. Its a great activity for the residents and the kids love it. I love it because...I know exactly where the candy came from (I bought it), it takes less than an hour and its a warm place unlike door to door (although this year...that wasn't an issue). After we finished there we went to our assisted living for a Halloween carnival. The kids had a blast playing games and winning little prizes. They also had a haunted hayrack ride that the kids insisted on going on. Madelyn screamed a lot and Christian's eyes got really big! I figured we would be sleeping in a bed with 4, but NO nightmares, so that's good.

Madelyn also decided that she is going to be something next year that has the same hair color as her. We had to shampoo her hair 5 times to get the red out!!!

My Baby Girl is 5.

Where on earth did the last 5 years go? I can not believe its been 5 years since I became a mom. Its been the best 5 years ever and I wish I could slow everything down. My babies are growing up way to fast. Last night I asked Madelyn to come give me cuddles and she says (in a rather disgusted voice) "From a five year old?". My heart sank...I said....absolutely!!! Then I asked her if 5 was too old to give cuddles and she said "no". Thank God she said "no"...I can't imagine my day without cuddles and loves from my kids.

There is definitely something to be said about having little ones around...and I am not exactly looking forward to the day when this changes. But right now....I am "the best mom ever", funny, cool and I get all the hugs and kisses that I want. It makes me sad to think they won't always think of me that way....but it all comes around full circle I suppose. Because I am sure at certain points in my life, I wasn't my mom's biggest fan and didn't think she was very cool....but now I do!!!

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder....

My girls' weekend in Vegas was a huge success. It included all the requirements...relaxation, fun, no work, and most importantly friends! We had such a great time catching up, hanging out and having fun. We never ran out of things to talk about that's for sure. But one thing I must say is that...being away definitely makes you appreciate your kids and hubby that much more. (And maybe it makes them appreciate me more too!) Its great to be home!!!


Check out my facebook for more photos...although the other ladies took way more pictures than me!

Kids being Kids

I have many things to explain in this picture. First we'll start with the fact that the kids are in their underwear. For some reason my children hate clothes, the minute we get home they ask if we are going anywhere, if the answer is "No" they strip. Sometimes they don't even ask they just strip. One day I am sure that they will be mortified to know they ran around naked or half-naked (like this photo) together. Even worse that they answer the door like this when the Schwan man comes?!?!?!?!?!

Then there's the mark on Christian's head. I didn't realize how much actual hair protects a person...or at least covers things up. He took a carpet dive at Daycare and ended up with this nice rug burn on his forehead!

Last, but definitely not least...the food. So I guess I was a little engrossed in my email and facebook when we got home tonight and I didn't start supper the minute I walked in the door (like I usually do). So after a little while I hollered at the kids asking them what they wanted for supper (Not getting up from the computer mind you!). Madelyn yelled back "Don't worry, we already made it!". I had to see this.... Now, how did I completely block out the sounds of them setting up their table, crawling on the counter to get the plates down and then gathering all their food. So what did they make for "supper". A heaping spoonful of peanut butter (at least its protein), potato chips (a vegetable I suppose) and bread with ketchup (a starch with a fruit technically) and lastly milk! You can't see the bread and ketchup but that's what Madelyn has shoved in her mouth. At least they hit all the food groups for the most part, right?!?!?!?!?!?!

So the moral of this story...they REALLY do need me!!!!!!!

PS. No I didn't let them eat that for supper!

How many signs does one person need?????

You may not be aware of my absolute hatred of mini-blinds; but I do hate them with a passion. Our old house had no mini-blinds. I removed them all after having Madelyn, because of the strangulation danger. Well, when we moved into our current house...we had a lot more windows and no curtains to cover them. So going against every motherly instinct I have I left the mini-blinds. But to make myself feel better, I did cut all the strings to the top so that they would not be dangling down, except when the blinds are up (which I never put them up). I did eventually find curtains, never really found ones I loved so I settled for sheers. As you all know sheers are transparent, so unless I wanted the whole neighborhood looking in the windows...I had to keep the blinds or find an alternate. So we have lived peacefully in the house this way for 20 months. SIGN 1: Then while jumping on her brother's bed, Madelyn sliced two of her fingers on the mini-blinds in Christians room. Not sure if it was on the strings or the blinds themselves because in the process two slates were broken. She probably could have used stitches in the one finger, but I weighed the options and thought a little bit wider scar on the finger compared to the trauma of another shot and stitches (not to mention getting them removed) I decided to steri-strip it and call it good. By the way...it healed nicely, not sure it will really scar at all.

SIGN 2: Then we come to yesterday....Scott saw a red mark on Madelyn's neck and he asked her what she did to get that. She said "I wrapped the mini-blinds cord around my neck". I FREAKED!!!! Needless to say, we made a trip to Lincoln and bought new curtains for the entire house. And all the mini-blinds have been removed and thrown away. Because I refuse to sell them on a garage sale for some other family with kids to put up in their house.

Yesterday just confirmed to me that I should NEVER go against my "Motherly instinct". Thank God the big guy upstairs gave me two signs to fix the problem!!! And that I am just talking about a rope burn and not something devastating.

You may wonder why I had the hatred in the first place, well a woman came to speak at my "mom's group" when I lived in Lincoln. She walked into her living room to find her four-year-old son hanging from the mini-blind cord. Luckily the father was able to perform CPR and he survived. But when she was talking, she spoke of other cases that were not such happy endings. The one that terrified me the most of a 11 year old boy that was found dead in his bed. The mini-blind cord must have been close to his bed and through the process of tossing and turning while sleeping that night he strangled himself. Can you imagine 11 years old?!?!?!?!

That's it...I am off my soap box.